Category: Misc

Say you're having a really strange dream. You suddenly wake up and all memory of the dream is lost, except for three words that won't leave your mind: Cornish game hens.

This happened to me on the morning of May 5th. Of course, I immediately wrote this down, because it certainly must be important. You see, I'm a little bit psychic. It's not something I can control, but every once in awhile I'll think or say something, and then later that day (sometimes mere seconds later) it will actually happen. Sometimes I'll think about a particular episode of a television show and then later that day, having not watched the show in years, that very episode will be playing. And sometimes I'll dream about something and then it will actually happen.

I can still recall the first time something like this happened to me. I was a child around 7 or 8 years old. My family went on a trip to see some caves and rock formations and stuff like that. Part of this trip included walking over a natural stone bridge. Being a stupid kid, I ran to the edge of this bridge, which freaked my parents out. Certainly I would plummet to my death. But I didn't. I got to the edge and stopped abruptly. I peered over the side. Suddenly, the entire place was familiar. I had seen it all before, from this exact angle. I suddenly remembered the dream I had about it, just a week earlier. Being logical, I figured I must have been here before and simply dreamed about it later on. I asked my parents if we'd ever been to this place before. The answer was, of course, "no". It was then that I knew I could see the future, even if I couldn't exactly do it "on demand".

Every time I've been pulled over by the cops, earlier in the day I had a strange feeling it would happen. Of course, then one would wonder why I did nothing to prevent being pulled over (you know, by not speeding). The only reasonable explanation, of course, is that if I predicted the future, then prevented it from happening, thus causing a different future, I didn't really predict the future then, did I?

Recently, I've noticed my thoughts coming true with increasing frequency. It's almost a daily occurrence now. Sometimes we like to play pranks on one of the guys at work. I came up with the idea of having a day where nobody talks to him at all. We would just act like he wasn't there. If we managed to pull it off, he would think he was dead. The very next week, that is exactly what happened on the new episode of South Park.

This stuff has gotten to the point where I try to take note of nearly every strange thing I think or say. One of these days I'm going to come up with something significant. Maybe I'll predict a terrorist attack or a natural disaster or some lottery numbers - you know, something important. And so, I decided to Google Cornish game hens, to see if it found anything.

Lo and behold, dated May 5th, we find this: Mother's Day Specials in the Miami Herald. It means something.